Guten Appetit!

It's a night of Spaetzle, Braised red cabbage, perhaps a little Jagerschnitzel, sweet and tart Sauerbraten and Beef Rolladen, of course, followed by Apple Strudel. The house is smothered with Germans tonight cooking up old fashioned oompah treasures minus the accordion player dressed in a Tyrolean jacket and hat.

Mutti and her friend 83 year old Ursala, straight from the Faderland, are folk-dancing their way around my kitchen to the sounds of midi melodies. A friend of mine who got her Ph.D in Herborn, Germany, is also joining the ruckus in a few minutes. Mutti is a good cook but a miserable one in hot weather. Her mood turns sour when the sauerkraut burns and alarms sound off throughout the house. She panics and frantically pulls everything off the stove shrieking in foul German tongue. "That's the last time I cook German for you!" she warns. She always says that but later rescinds when I remind her how wonderful German Potatoe Salad tastes.

Deutch dinners are no 30-minute meals. They take hours and sometimes days to prepare. Konditionare, German pastries, specialties like Curry Wurst, Bratwurst and Kabobs; if you decide to visit Deutchland anytime soon just remember how difficult it is to cook cuisine there. So take your time, kick back with a bier and savor every bite.